BLACK AND WHITE:

Tales of the Texas Highway Patrol

by

BEN H. ENGLISH

Law Enforcement Biography / Memoir / Ethics & Morals

Publisher: Creative Texts Publishers
Pages: 250 pages
Publication Date: June 7, 2022

You know, I never saw an officer, an EMT, a fireman, or an ER crew ask anyone what their politics were and then refuse to care for them because of their answer. The color of skin pigment, the last name, the amount of money in a bank account, none of that mattered.

All that mattered was someone needed help, and they had the skills as well as the burning desire to do so.

Yes, they are only human and internally flawed and prejudiced as any other. But their true nature, their crowning glory in mortal life, is their ability to rise above those flaws and prejudices when called upon.

In a world of hungry, destructive wolves, they stand as the sheepdog who serves and protects the flock.

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RADIO INTERVIEW:

Alpine Radio-Texas KVLF station owner Martin Benevich interviews

Ben H. English about Black and White: Tales of the Texas Highway Patrol and more

Ben H. English is an eighth-generation Texan who grew up in the Big Bend. At seventeen he joined the Marines, ultimately becoming a chief scout-sniper as well as an infantry platoon sergeant. Later he worked counterintelligence and traveled to over thirty countries on four continents.

At Angelo State University he graduated Magna Cum Laude along with other honors. Afterward Ben had a career in the Texas Highway Patrol, holding several instructor billets involving firearms, driving, patrol procedures, and defensive tactics.

After retirement, he decided to try his hand at writing. His first effort, Yonderings, was accepted by a university press and garnered some awards. His second, Destiny’s Way, led to a long-term, multi-book contract.  This was followed by Out There: Essays on the Lower Big Bend and now his second fictional work, The Uvalde Raider.
His intimate knowledge of what he writes about lends credence and authenticity to his work. Ben knows how it feels to get hit and hit back, or being thirsty, cold, wet, hungry, alone, or exhausted beyond imagination. Finally, he knows of not only being the hunter, but also the hunted.

Ben and his wife have two sons who both graduated from Annapolis. He still likes nothing better than grabbing a pack and some canteens and heading out to where few others venture.
Just as he has done throughout most of his life…

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Synopsis

If you want your life to amount to more than just anonymously passing through this world unnoticed, this book is for you. It describes how you can make your mark on your family, friends, and society and how you can create a legacy that will benefit future generations.

When the time comes for you to leave this world, you can go out with class, style, and pizzazz, just like you lived your life. There are many options, possibilities, and decisions involved in planning a final farewell, as we will see as we watch the Grand Exit of Timothy A.B. Smythe. Timothy’s Grand Exit will have people’s tongues waggin’ for a long time, and it can serve as an inspiration for your final farewell when the time comes.

Much of the information in the book is presented in true stories, scenarios, and examples that are upbeat, often humorous, and fun to read.

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Review

Mixed with humor, this book shares ways to make your mark in this world so that you will be remembered for years to come.

When I first picked up this book, I had to admit that it really drew me in and made me think about what legacy I wanted to leave that represented my life. I’m still unsure, but this book gave me a lot to think about. There is a wide variety of suggestions, and not all of them have to cost much money.

There are also quite a few stories about how people set up their requests once they passed. That is something that people need to think about, and these stories might help guide you and make you laugh at the same time.

This is a quick read but chock full of useful advice and one that can be read several times over and still discover something new.

We give this book 5 paws up.

About the Author

Peter Davidson is the author or co-author of twenty-nine books published by McGraw-Hill Book Company, Perigee/Putnam Publishers, Northwestern Publishing Company, Sweet Memories Publishing, Haworth Press, and others.  His works include fiction, non-fiction, college textbooks, children’s picture books, and training materials for business and industry.  Davidson is also a songwriter and one of his songs was used in a television series in The Netherlands.

For more than two decades, Peter Davidson was one of America’s most active writer’s seminar presenters, having presented over 625 one-day seminars in a fifteen-state area from Minnesota to Tennessee and Colorado to Illinois.

Davidson has been a professional recording studio owner, college professor, and retail store owner.  He trained over 700 real estate agents, something that he believes he will have to answer for on  Judgment Day.

Davidson is the recipient of the prestigious Leavey Award granted by Freedoms Foundation at Valley Forge. Davidson and his wife live in the Lake Okoboji resort area of Iowa in summer and in Arizona in the winter.

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Synopsis

Magic, miracles, travel, and romance–this is where Renee leads you in her long-awaited sequel to The Burn Zone. From love affairs with men half her age to being rescued by angels to getting stranded at 22,000 feet in the Himalayas and being electrocuted in the Maldives, Renee takes you on a wild page-turning adventure, sharing with you soul-soothing wisdom she gained along the way.

Where The Burn Zone was an exploration of what happens when we don’t listen to our Inner Guidance, Still on Fire is an exposition of what happens when we do. As Renee courageously takes leap after leap into the unknown, picks up the pieces after being shattered, and recounts hilarious attempts to regain her mojo, you will see yourself in her stories. You will remember it is not only okay but necessary to try and fail. And your heart will be lifted as you become reminded of a deep truth you have always known but may have forgotten along the way–life is magic and anything is possible.

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Excerpt

Chapter 1: Slow Down

by Renee Linnell

Author of Still on Fire

I have a confession to make: I’m not very good at being human. I still can’t figure it out. For the life of me, I cannot figure out other people, and even after all these years of trying, I can’t figure out myself. And maybe that’s the whole point. Maybe that’s what makes life dynamic and thrilling. I’m not sure. Maybe “I’m not sure” is the answer to all of it.

I have noticed that anytime I think I’m sure, life comes along and proves me wrong. I have noticed that anytime I think I’m sure, I turn into a bit of an asshole. I close my mind to ideas and concepts and people that oppose the way I think I’m sure. And I am really beginning to see how quantum physics is right when it tells us there are billions of simultaneous realities. The Buddha said, “With our thoughts we make the world.” Science is finally catching up to what the mystics, saints, and shamans have been saying for thousands of years: our thoughts create our reality. There are billions of us, each with a unique perspective, so there are billions of simultaneous realities. No wonder we can’t get along.

What if we stopped trying so hard to get others to see from our point of view? What if we finally realized our point of view works for us because it is ours. But everyone else has a point of view that works for each one of them. If it didn’t work, they would seek alternative information and change it.

What if life on Earth really is just the ultimate video game? We incarnate in these bodies, and like Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson and the other characters do in the movie Jumanji, we have to figure out how our avatars work. We discover our strengths and weaknesses. We learn about our bodies, our flaws, and our unique skill sets. We discover our likes and dislikes. Personal preferences. And we fine-tune as we go.

We get plopped into these bodies and these personalities that are constantly surprising us. And at the same time, we get plopped into a world where every single other human is living in a different reality, looking through a different lens. They are creating from a different lens, and with a different skill set, different wants and needs. And then we add that each human is projecting that different reality onto everybody else: Thieves think everyone else is stealing from them; lovers think everyone else has good intentions; cheaters think everyone else is cheating; fighters always find people with whom to fight. You get the point.

Combine all that with the fact that when we are young, and often for most of our lives, we bend and mold and shape ourselves into false versions of ourselves to fit in and people-please. And we end up with a shit show. Seriously. It’s fascinating.

The only way to unwind the shit show is for each one of us to stop caring so much about what other people think about us, to stop comparing our lives to the lives of others, to start discovering who we truly are, and then to build an authentic life around it. This raises us up, out of the mess, and it washes off the shit so that we sparkle with light. If we trust that we are here for a reason, that we are unique for a reason, and that a divine path is already lined up for us, life gets a lot easier. As we admit we do not know, that it is all a mystery, that as soon as we think we have the world or ourselves or anyone else figured out, we get the carpet pulled out from under us—we get our paradigm shattered—life gets a lot more fun. It’s like walking up to the River of Life and someone asking, “Where does this river go?” and you answer, “I have no idea, but it sure looks like fun!” and jump in. Arms up in the air. Ready for the ride. Trusting that wherever the ride leads is someplace amazing.

This morning I was meditating in my favorite living room chair, and I had a vision of myself in that same chair at about eighty years old. I saw how little and how wrinkled and how wise this version of me was. She was glowing. She was so patient, so calm, so content. And she offered me advice. She said to me, “Slow down.”

Just those two words.

“Slow down.”

She sat there in her comfy lounge clothing with her warm cup of coffee, and she was so beautiful in her calm, in her peace, in her wisdom.

“Slow down.”

She said, “You will be here in a flash, and you don’t want to miss any moment of it.” She told me, “It is all coming. All of it. All that you dream about. But it is not your work to do. It is God’s work to do through you. If you do not slow down, you cannot be a clear channel. The same way you cannot rush a baby into this world, you cannot rush your accomplishments; they will be born when they are meant to be born, after the proper gestation. Your unique contribution will be offered. It must be. But if you rush the process, you end up with a child that does not have fully function- ing lungs. So, please, my love, slow down.”

From Still on Fire: A Memoir by Renee Linnell. Published by Pink Skeleton Publishing. Copyright © 2022 by Renee Linnell.

About the Author

Renee Linnell is a serial entrepreneur who has founded or cofounded five companies and has an MBA from New York University; before that she was a model and professional dancer. Her mission is to remind people Who They Truly Are and to reignite their passion for being alive. What began as writing for catharsis in 2013—as she struggled to regain her sanity after being brainwashed in a Buddhist cult—turned into her first memoir, The Burn Zone: A Memoir (She Writes Press, 2018). Still on Fire is the sequel.

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Synopsis

Drafted by the Philadelphia Eagles in 1996, Dawkins fought to elevate not only his own game but that of his entire team. He sweat, bled, and dominated through sixteen season in the NFL all the way into the Hall of Fame, but not for a moment did he believe his strength alone brought him that glory. Every step of the way the Lord had his back. From coaches that wanted to break him to defeats and bitter lessons in humility, his career is a testament to his faith and an homage to the countless people that helped him along the way.

In the wake of his success, Dawkins comes forward to describe his journey to become one the best safeties in the NFL. Physical training wouldn’t cut it. Blessed by the Best follows Dawkins trials to train his mind and faith along with his skill. As a nervous kid from Jacksonville, he never dreamed of one day standing in front of a crowd to accept that golden jacket. But one way or another, he made it. Dawkins tells his story straight, unafraid of exposing his own weaknesses; his over competitive spirit that takes losses to hard, the tunnel vision that estranged him from his kids, and the self-doubt that plagued much of his early years. Triumphs, pitfalls, love, and struggles Dawkins shares them all, not for himself, but in gratitude of those who have helped him along the way.

“I had been blessed by the best. First, that meant the Lord, who has blessed me with so much. It also meant all those people and things around me that I believe were the best for me. Maybe they weren’t the best for somebody else. Your best may not be my best. That’s fine. Everything that has happened to me has been to bring out the best in me. Even the toughest, hardest times in my life were the best things for me. If I hadn’t gone through them, maybe I wouldn’t be the person I am today.”

“This is not a football book. It has football in it, but this is a life tool,” Dawkins told Heavy. “These are things that I have gone through in my life, that others have taught me.”

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Praise

“This book is without a doubt the most powerful and poignant autobiography I’ve ever read by a retired professional athlete – ever. And, of course, it would be. In my nearly three decades of covering the NFL for ESPN, I have never encountered anyone like Brian Dawkins. After reading this highly personal, truly inspirational autobiography, now I know why. If you are a parent, a teacher, a coach, a leader in any way in your profession or life, you can learn so much from Brian and this book. His message cuts through all the clutter of our age. His life is a timely reminder that we can do good, for ourselves, our families, our community and our country. Brian is a living embodiment of that. This book is testimony to that achievement – and it can be yours, too.” –Sal Paolantonio, National Correspondent, ESPN

“Blessed by the Best” is a journey into the life of someone who inspired me to never settle for being mediocre. Brian Dawkins’ aim in life has always been to be better than those around him physically, mentally and spiritually. Brian was not only an incredible football player but an awesome friend, and his faith and drive are electric and contagious. “Blessed by the Best” is a must read and will surely motivate you in all areas of your life.”-Brian Westbrook, two-time Pro Bowl halfback with the Eagles and San Francisco, 2002-10

“Just as he played, his book is honest and passionate. He reveals his struggles and accomplishments from his point of view. My favorite player of all time in any sport. Went to Canton to see him inducted. It was an incredible trip. Wishing him many more blessings.”- Mommashark, Amazon

“Amazing Book! This book is definitely worth reading. As a person struggling or anyone that wants advice to help guide you to overcome and become stronger in different aspects of your life, I would suggest this.”-Flea, Amazon

Guest Review by Nora

‘Blessed By the Best,’ is not just a memoir by famous football Hall-of-Famer Brian Dawkins, but in some ways, it is a self-help book for people who may be a little lost and seeking guidance on themselves and their relationship with God.

Brian Dawkins was raised in Jacksonville, Florida in a neighborhood that anyone of us would probably recognize. From this normal childhood came a great football player, who would later go on to join the hall of fame. But Dawkins himself insists that he is not any more special than anyone else, and that his mindset and his faith are what propelled him to the station that he now has in life.

Coming up from humble beginnings and not being a particularly big guy, Dawkins did not seem slated for greatness as a child. After struggling academically, he was granted a scholarship to Clemson University only because a friend from his high school football team requested that he be given one.

Dawkins took that golden opportunity and ran with it. With the help of his wife, Connie, Dawkins used his natural ambition and his faith to take hold of every opportunity he was given– and that includes his failures, which he views as learning opportunities. Eventually, Dawkins would go on to play 16 seasons for the Philadelphia Eagles and, later, the Denver Broncos, before deciding to retire. Dawkins was then inducted into the hall of fame, a process which he fully describes in the book.

‘Blessed By the Best,’ is as insightful as it is compelling, and it is certainly a great read. Before this book, I never knew how good of a writer Brian Dawkins is, and it definitely made me want to read more of his thoughts. We don’t share the same religious views but I still learned a lot and it inspired me.

This book is a fascinating look into the life of a talented guy, and I’m glad I read it!

Excerpt

How His Faith Continued to Impact His Play

Many people say that the biggest jump an NFL player makes comes between his first and second years. He understands the game better, both on and off the field. Everything isn’t new anymore. He should have learned how to watch film more carefully. He should have a better understanding of how he must train and prepare— not only the importance of, but also having a plan to care of his body and deal with what goes on inside a locker room. In short, he is no longer a rookie.

All of that happened to me, but the biggest jump I made was in my faith. That’s when the Second Letter of Paul to St. Timothy came in. One verse in particular spoke powerfully to me, and it helped me greatly with my ability to live as a man and thrive as a football player.

For the Lord has not given us a spirit of fear but one of power, love, and of a sound mind [or self-control]. – 2 Timothy 1:7

Thinking about that verse and meditating on it would help me overcome those anxious moments, even on the field. If a bad play happened, I might have had an instinct to play the next one more safely or carefully. I could have been afraid to give up another big play. Instead, I would repeat that message to myself, and I would believe it. And when the next play happened, I might step in front of a pass and take it the other way. Or I might make a big hit that changes the game’s momentum. It made me more confident. I had a sound mind. I had self-discipline. I was not fearful of playing aggressive. I was operating in my full God-given power. And as long as I had been operating in fear, I wasn’t giving all I had to give. Which was hurting my teammates more than me making an occasional mistake because I was taking educated guesses.

In that moment, the Lord did not give us fear. That is something we have brought on ourselves. The Lord gave us power and love and strong minds, and we have to accept those gifts and use them. The combination of my faith and belief in the good things the Lord gave me, along with understanding the game better, really knowing the playbook and being able to anticipate what would happen next, made me a better player. I believed I could run with those fastest wide receivers. I could tackle running backs that other defensive players struggled to deal with. Even take on the biggest of cats if need be. No, I didn’t win every battle, but when that happened I was coming back harder next time.

I remember in 1998 tackling Hall of Famer Barry Sanders in the open field. Very few people could do that, because once Barry got past the line of scrimmage, he had so many moves he could make people look really bad. So, I was thinking, “Oh, I can play this game.” It was a powerful feeling, because I believed in the gifts the Lord had given me, and I had the physical gifts and desire to put in the work. Talk about a great combination.

© Blessed by the Best by Brian Dawkins (Pages 114-115, 116)

About the Author

In this Aug. 25, 2006, file photo, Philadelphia Eagles safety Brian Dawkins stands on the sidelines during a preseason NFL football game against the Pittsburgh Steelers in Philadelphia. The veteran safety announced through his Twitter account Monday, April 23, 2012, that he is retiring from the NFL after 16 seasons. Dawkins spent his first 13 seasons with the Eagles and his last three with the Denver Broncos. (AP Photo/George Widman, file)

Brian Dawkins entered the NFL in the second round of the 1996 draft and has since achieved 1,131 tackles, 37 achieved passes, 26 recorded sacks and 19 fumble recoveries, which has earned him a place in the NFL Hall of Fame. Out of his 16 career seasons, Dawkins spent 13 with the Eagles before signing as an unrestricted free agent with the Denver Broncos in 2008. Despite the team change, Dawkins still holds several team records for the Eagles, and as of 2012 his jersey number 20 has become one of only nine to be retired in the history of the franchise.

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This giveaway ends on July 15, 2022 midnight, pacific time.

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Synopsis

In this laughter-through-tears memoir, Sallie H. Weissinger, a late-in-life widow, recounts the highs and lows of navigating the tricky online dating world of the 2000s. Interwoven throughout her adventures in search of a new relationship are stories from her childhood as a military brat, her southern heritage, her various marriages, and the volunteer work in Central and South America that helped her keep moving forward through it all.

Weissinger keeps her sense of humor as she meets men who lie, men who try to extort money, and men with unsavory pasts. When she experiences even more loss, her search for a partner becomes less important, but—with the help of friends and dogs—she perseveres and, ultimately, develops her own approach to meeting “HIM.” Blending the deeply serious and the lighthearted, Yes Again shows us that good things happen when we open up our minds and hearts.

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Praise

“A funny, touching, and ultimately uplifting story of a woman searching for love and purpose.”—Kirkus Reviews

“Weissinger celebrates her 75th birthday in Yes, Again by taking the reader on a tour of her big heart and where that heart has taken her. This glorious story of a life lived in love is the perfect read because it’s hilarious, honest and full of hope. We are all lovers, or we wish we were and Sallie shows us how: never give up, occasionally give in and don’t stop believing. Brava!”-Adriana Trigiani, Bestselling author of Tony’s Wife

“If you like to read memoirs, you won’t be disappointed in Sallie H. Weissinger’s Yes, Again. I really loved it….it was a pleasure to read a book written by a woman who didn’t let age get in the way of seeking love and living life fully. While she may not have realized it when writing, Sallie provided a life lesson for those of us of a certain age: There’s no reason not to take charge of our lives and make things happen. Whether it’s looking for love, reaching personal and professional goals, or living on purpose every day, women can disrupt aging and rise to life’s challenges.”—Camille Goscicki, vitalaging4women.com

“After reading Sallie’s soulful book, I have to say this gifted writer got the love she wanted the old-fashioned way . . . she earned it!”-Lacy J. Dalton, singer, and songwriter

“Linearity works for many things; however, in Sallie H. Weissinger’s potent book (and even more potent life) she shows us how tapping into grace can be a tangible way of entering into mystery, meaning, and direction. By recounting times of staggering loss, loneliness, self-doubt, perseverance, and openness to the ineffable, Sallie demonstrates how the journey of life can be a glorious pathway for those with a bit of daring!”-Bill Say, MA, life coach, Process Work Diplomate, and instructor at CIIS, JFK University, and the Wright Institute

Review by Gracie

A memoir wholly unlike anything you’ve ever read, ‘Yes, Again: (Mis)adventures of a Wishful Thinker’ by Sallie Wiessinger starts at the end. Or, at least, I’m sure that is what Wessinger herself thought at that point in her life.

At the age of 57, Weissinger lost her husband of 24 years to esophageal cancer. Feeling lost and not sure what to do with herself, Weissinger took a year to mourn before deciding that she was not quite ready to hang up her hat and spend her twilight years alone.

Now, many of us are probably all too familiar with the concept of online dating. You make a profile, hope that someone likes what they see and contacts you, and then, with any luck go out on a date that doesn’t end in a restraining order.

But Weissinger choose to do online dating a little bit differently. Not only was she doing it well before the days of Tinder and Bumble (her husband passed in 2002 when online dating was still very much in its infancy) but she also established a list of rules for herself early on.

She would seek out a man that fit a certain list of criteria. He had to be emotionally stable, spiritual, religious (not or not very), adventurous, physically fit, a travel aficionado, intelligent, and have no monkey business.

As a lover of puzzles, Weissinger came up with an anagram for the first letter of each attribute. PASTRAMI was the anagram that she landed on, and from there on everything was gravy. Or…almost anyway. But you’ll have to read the book to find out what I mean by that.

‘Yes, Again,’ is an absolute riot. Both a celebration of life and a reminder that you are never too old to start over, this memoir is a win for book lovers everywhere.

About the Author

Sallie H. Weissinger is a native of New Orleans and was raised as a military brat away from the South (Germany, New Mexico, Ohio, Japan, and Michigan). Every summer, she and her family returned to visit her mother’s relatives in New Orleans and her father’s family in a small Alabama town. She has lived most of her life in the Bay Area and also in New Orleans. These days, “home” includes not only New Orleans and Berkeley, but also Portland, Oregon, where she lives most of the time with her husband, Bart McMullan, a retired internal medicine doctor and health care executive, and their three dogs.

A retired executive herself, she now teaches Spanish and does medical interpreting for non-profit organizations in Central America and the Dominican Republic. Weissinger is a passionate member of the Berkeley Rotary Club and has served on the boards of Berkeley Rotary, the Aurora Theatre in Berkeley, and the East Bay (formerly Oakland) SPCA.

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Giveaway

This giveaway is for 1 print copy.

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Synopsis

They were just kids, barely not teenagers, madly in love and wanting to be a family, but WW2 and a B29 got in their way.

Three hundred ten days before Pearl Harbor, buck private Dean Sherman innocently went to church with a new friend in Salt Lake City. From that moment, the unsuspecting soldier travelled a remarkable, heroic path, falling in love, graduating from demanding training to become a B29 pilot, conceiving a son and entering the China, Burma and India theater of the WW2.

He chronicled his story with letters home to his bride Connie that he met on that fateful Sunday, blind to the fact that fifteen hundred seventy five days after their meeting, a Japanese swordsman would end his life.

His crew, a gaggle of Corporals that dubbed themselves the Corporealizes, four officers and a tech Sargent, adventured their way across the globe. Flying the “Aluminum Trail” also called the Hump through the Himalayas, site of the most dangerous flying in the world. Landing in China to refuel and then fly on to places like Manchuria, Rangoon or even the most southern parts of Japan to drop 500 pounders.

Each mission had its challenges, minus fifty degree weather in Mukden, or Japanese fighters firing away at them, a close encounter of the wrong kind, nearly missing a collision with another B29 while flying in clouds, seeing friends downed and lost because of “mechanicals,” the constant threat of running out of fuel and their greatest fear, engine fire.

Transferred to the Mariana Islands, he and his crew were shot down over Nagoya, Japan as part of Mission 174, captured and declared war criminals.

Connie’s letters reveal life for a brand new mother whose husband is declared MIA. The agony for both of them, he in a Japanese prison, declared a war criminal, and she just not knowing why his letters stopped coming.

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Praise

“This was an amazing book. This isn’t a look at war through rose-colored glasses, but one that shows the reader what life was like for people from many backgrounds. A soldier, his love left behind on the home front, and those that were considered the enemy at the time. This was an intimate story that doesn’t focus only on the war and pulls the reader in quickly and easily. Historical fiction lovers, those with an interest in war history, and anyone just looking to take a few steps back in time will greatly enjoy reading this.”- Liliyana Shadowlyn, The Faerie Review

“The fact that the premise for this book started with the story that Marvin told and then the letters from Dean and Connie shows how much research Roger Stark put into writing this book. I love how he revolves all of the events around the dates of the letters. The letters give the reader a reprieve from the atrocities of war and show the humanity of the soldiers fighting. There are some parts of the war that are shared that are so vivid and so horrifying – both on the part of the Japanese and on the part of the Americans. It is so heart-wrenching to think that these young (barely) men were out in those situations.

My almost-93-year-old grandpa, whose name is Marvin and who served in the Korean War, also read this book, and he really liked the story. For anyone who likes to read books based on wars or just history in general, I definitely recommend this one. It is also a love story that unfolds and is eye-opening to horrors that were experienced.”-Heather, 2 Many Books, 2 Little Time

“Told in prose with diary-style sections of narration as well as central figure 1st Lt Dean Harold Sherman’s own personal correspondence, this is a beautiful tale of enduring romance and the heroism of those who fought and flew during the latter part of World War Two during the United States’ conflict with Japan. What results is a touching family saga that also foreshadows the great horrors and sacrifices of life in war. Author Roger Stark has crafted an emotive work with plenty of historical richness, pathos, and heart to offer readers. One of the features which I found particularly impressive about this piece was the heartfelt presentation of the unshakeable bond between Dean and Connie, both through the curation of their own words to one another and the contextual gap-filling which Stark achieves with facts, but also emotionally sensitive additions and details. Overall, I would highly recommend They Called Him Marvin to fans of accurate wartime accounts and for enthusiasts of World War Two reports.”- K.C. Finn, Readers’ Favorite

Guest Review by Nora

There are many things to love about Roger Stark’s, ‘They Called Him Marvin.’ Number one would be the love story, of course.

The book revolves around the real-life love story between a Private (later Lieutenant) in the U.S. Army named Dean Sherman and a young woman named Constance Baldwin. Dean met his wife, Connie, in 1941, just months before the bombing of Pearl Harbor.

This was a time when countless families were being pulled apart, and Dean and Connie were no exception. Dean was a pilot, and he was needed to fly planes into Japan. Connie was pregnant and obviously distraught by this news, but she returned home to her parent’s house in Utah to wait for her baby to arrive– and wait for her husband to one day return from the war.

Unfortunately, Dean was taken as a POW in Japan after his plane went down over Nagoya. He was never able to return home and never able to meet his son, Marvin but it is through Connie and Marvin’s work in finding correspondence from Dean that this book was able to be written.

‘They Called Him Marvin,’ is a look at the toll of the most devastating war of the 20^th century, through the eyes of average Americans and the people that they left behind. Roger Stark shows a different side of the war, that many history books leave out, and does so with the kind of beautiful, moving prose that makes you feel intimately connected to the lives of the people in the book.

As a reader, I felt for Dean and Connie, and wanted them to be reunited, despite knowing from the beginning that they would never have that opportunity. Stark perfectly portrayed the emotions that Connie must have felt after learning of her husband’s disappearance, a life-shattering devastating that she continued to feel for the rest of her life, as she raised their son.

Five stars for this heart-wrenching work of historical fiction, and for Roger Stark’s writing!

Excerpt

Dean and Connie exchanged 67 letters (50 written by Dean.) The reason for the disparity, the only “Connie” letters we have were those written after Dean went MIA and were returned to her as undeliverable.

One reviewer reacted to the letters this way: The letters between Connie and Dean provided a fascinating glimpse into wartime life. Reading the experiences of people both at home and abroad was very engaging. I found myself eagerly awaiting the next letter, right along with the young couple!

The night (unbeknownst to him) that his son Marvin was born Dean wrote:

India –18 February 1945

Good Evening Peaches:

Hello sweet girl, I sure have been thinking of you lots these days and wishing so much that I could be around to take care of you, and be holding your nice soft hands and giving you lots of moral support, and see your pretty face and look in your eyes and without saying a word, tell you millions of wonderful things that you mean to me.  You do too, Honey, mean so many wonderful things to me.  All the wonderful things a beautiful girl can be and my best companion ever along with being the sweetest wife any guy ever could love. Those are just a few of the things, Darling, which make me love you more every day…

Goodnight Peach Blossom,

Dean

On the day Dean was shot down Connie Wrote:

#57 — 14 May 1945

My most wonderful man,

I’m in a rather odd mood tonight Honey, and it is most all about you and Marvin and me.  I have been trying to decide whether or not I would write to you tonight most all evening.  I wanted to, but I didn’t know if I could express my feelings as I would want to, and, as I feel them.  As you can see Honey, I have made up my mind to try.  How well I succeed remains to be seen…

Then I was thinking of Marvin and wondering just what his talents are going to be.  To have a Daddy such as you, Honey, he will be kind and good, even as you are, a wonderful man.  Honey, I’m really just beginning to realize what a great responsibility we have in teaching and caring for Marvin.  We just have to do it to the very best of our ability.  I know you have lots of ability, Honey, and I hope I have…

I have a hard time, the past seems like such a thrilling dream of love and happiness.  I wonder if it all really happened, but then I know it did.  And Oh!  Honey how I do love you now and forever and ever ever after with all my heart and soul.  Honey I just can’t express how deep my love for you is.  Its an impossibility.  I love you always.

Good night my husband,

Peaches

About the Author

Roger Stark, by his own admission, is a reluctant writer. But there are stories that demand to be told. When we hear them, we must pick up our pen, lest we forget and the stories are lost. Six years ago, in a quiet conversation with his friend, Marvin, he learned the tragic story of his father, a WW2 B-29 Airplane Commander, shot down over Nagoya, Japan, just months before the end of the war.

The telling of the story that evening by this half orphan was so moving and full of emotion, that it compelled Roger to ask if he could write the story. The result is “They Called Him Marvin.”

Roger Stark’s life has been profoundly touched in so many ways by being part of documenting this sacred story. He prays that we never forget, as a people, the depth of sacrifice that was made by ordinary people like Marvin and his father and mother on our behalf.

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Giveaway

This giveaway is for 3 print copies, one for each of the 3 winners.

This giveaway is open to the U.S. only and ends on June 24, 2022 midnight, pacific time.

Entries are accepted via Rafflecopter only.

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Synopsis

Tao Calligraphy is a revolutionary healing art based on an ancient form of one-stroke calligraphy from China. Dr. & Master Zhi Gang Sha now brings this healing frequency to everyone through a new book series.

The first book in the series, Tao Calligraphy to Heal and Rejuvenate Your Back offers relief from back pain, a problem all too familiar to many Americans. According to Georgetown University’s Institute for Health Care Research and Policy study, nearly 65 million Americans report a recent episode of back pain.

Tao Calligraphy is Source art, a revolutionary new healing art and transformational tool that helps people clear away root blockages that underlie their challenges in health, relationships, finances, and more. Everyone and everything is a vibrational field. Tao Calligraphy works by providing a Source positive vibrational field that people can easily access and harness to transform negative aspects of their own vibrational field, which can result in healing and positive life changes.

Tao Calligraphy to Heal and Rejuvenate Your Back contains two pieces of Tao Calligraphy Transformative Art that provide Source positive vibrational fields that can harmonize and uplift every aspect of life. One of these Tao Calligraphies carries a specific message for healing the back. It’s called “Tao Bei” – Tao Back. The other Tao Calligraphy is called “Da Ai,” which means Greatest Love. Both calligraphies can be applied for healing and transformation.

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Excerpt

Why Do People Have Challenges in Health, Relationships, Finances, and Every Aspect of Life?

by Dr. & Master Zhi Gang Sha,

Author of Tao Calligraphy to Heal and Rejuvenate Your Back

Millions of people suffer from sickness in the physical body, including all kinds of pain, inflammation, cysts, tumors, cancer, COVID-19, and many other sicknesses.

Millions of people suffer from sickness in the emotional body, including anger, depression, anxiety, worry, grief, fear, guilt, shame, loneliness, and more.

Millions of people suffer from sickness in the mental body, including poor concentration, diminishing memory, negative thinking, judgment, ego, and many mental disorders, such as schizophrenia, OCD, PTSD, and more.

Millions of people suffer from sickness in the spiritual body, because the soul can carry negative information. In fact, as we have seen in the Universal Law of Shen Qi Jing, negative information is the root cause of all kinds of sickness in the physical, emotional, mental, and spiritual bodies.

Millions of people have relationship challenges, including with partners, parents, children, siblings, other relatives, friends, bosses, employees, colleagues, organizations, and more.

Organizations, belief systems, cities, countries, and more could also have relationship challenges with each other.

Millions of people have environmental challenges, including polluted air, water, or land, inadequate shelter, unhealthy food, lack of healthcare, and more.

Millions of people have financial challenges.

Why do we have so many challenges in every aspect of life?

What is the key to understanding all of these challenges?

Is there a solution for these challenges?

If so, what is the solution?

I wrote this book to answer these four questions. Above all, I wrote this book to serve you, humanity, and Mother Earth.

In one sentence:

Humanity has all kinds of challenges in health, relationships, finances, the spiritual journey, and every aspect of life because of negative information, energy, and matter (negative shen qi jing).

What is the key to understanding all of these challenges? In one sentence, the key is that the heart and the soul are affected and influenced by negative information, energy, and matter.

Is there a solution for these challenges? In one sentence, the solution to all challenges in health, relationships, finances, the spiritual journey, and every aspect of life is to apply positive information, energy, and matter (positive shen qi ing) to transform negative information, energy, and matter.

Positive Information, Energy, and Matter

Tao Science states that information, energy, and matter can be positive or negative. This revolutionary insight helps us deeply understand sickness, healing, and transformation. What are positive information, energy, and matter? Positive information, energy, and matter are any information, energy, or matter that promotes order, connection, and harmony. Positive information, energy, and matter can heal and transform sickness, prevent sickness, rejuvenate, prolong life, harmonize relationships, boost finances and business, and enlighten one’s spiritual journey.

There are ten qualities that carry the most-positive information, energy, and matter: greatest love, greatest forgiveness, greatest compassion, greatest light, greatest humility, greatest harmony, greatest flourishing, greatest gratitude, greatest service, and greatest enlightenment. I will explain these ten greatest qualities in more detail in chapter eight.

Because these ten greatest qualities are the most-positive information, energy, and matter, they can transform every aspect of life. They are the highest wisdom. At the same time, they are the highest practice. They carry the highest power.

In ancient wisdom, shu yi zai Dao 书以载道, which means calligraphy is used to carry Tao. In this book, I share two Tao Calligraphies I have written to carry some of the ten greatest qualities to serve you, as well as to serve families, humanity, organizations, cities, countries, and Mother Earth.

Tao Calligraphy is Tao Source Oneness writing. It is art. It is art beyond art that can heal and transform health, relationships, finances, the spiritual journey, and every aspect of life. I will teach you how to practice in the Tao Calligraphy Field to transform every aspect of life. The practices are simple but profound. Practice is vital for you to receive the greatest possible benefits that I wish you and every reader to receive.

In one sentence:

All good health, harmonious relationships, flourishing finances and business, and enlightened spiritual journeys are due to positive information, energy, and matter.

Negative Information, Energy, and Matter

What are negative information, energy, and matter? Negative information, energy, and matter are any information, energy, or matter that promotes disorder, disconnection, and disharmony. Negative information, energy, and matter cause sickness, relationship challenges, and financial challenges. Negative information, energy, and matter block one’s spiritual journey. Negative information, energy, and matter create blockages in every aspect of life.

A human being has physical, emotional, mental, and spiritual bodies.

In the physical body, any lack of energy, vitality, or stamina; any pain, inflammation, cysts, tumors, or cancer; and all other sicknesses are negative information, energy, and matter.

In the emotional body, anger, depression, anxiety, guilt, shame, worry, grief, fear, and more are negative information, energy, and matter.

In the mental body, confusion, mental disorders, poor concentration, poor memory, ego, and more are negative information, energy, and matter.

In the spiritual body, not understanding or realizing the importance of the soul journey, which is the spiritual journey, getting lost on one’s spiritual journey, creating mistakes of hurting and harming others and the environment, and more are negative information, energy, and matter.

For relationships, any disharmony in any kind of relationship is negative information, energy, and matter.

For finances, all blockages in any aspect of finances are negative information, energy, and matter.

For a business, any challenge in any part of the business is negative information, energy, and matter.

In one sentence:

All challenges, blockages, and failures in health, relationships, finances, and the spiritual journey are due to negative information, energy, and matter.

How to Transform Negative Information, Energy, and Matter

To transform all challenges in health, relationships, finances, the spiritual journey, and every aspect of life is to transform negative information, energy, and matter to positive information, energy, and matter.

I am delighted to offer a Tao Source practical tool to help you, families, society, organizations, humanity, and Mother Earth. This practical tool is named Tao Calligraphy.

Tao Calligraphy creates and carries an Ultimate Source most-positive field, which could transform negative fields in all life, including health, relationships, finances, and the spiritual journey. Health includes four bodies: physical, emotional, mental, and spiritual.

An excerpt from Tao Calligraphy to Heal and Rejuvenate Your Back by Dr. & Master Zhi Gang Sha. Copyright © 2022 by Heaven’s Library Publication Corp. Published by Heaven’s Library Publication Corp. and Waterside Productions.

About the Author

Dr. and Master Zhi Gang Sha is the author of thirty-one books, including eleven New York Times bestsellers and bestsellers on the lists of the Wall Street Journal, USA Today, and Amazon. He brings ancient wisdom to modern times to help people reach optimal wellness and greater happiness.

Dr. and Master Sha offers a guide for enhancing many aspects of life through soul secrets, wisdom, and simple, practical techniques. As a doctor of both Western and traditional Chinese medicine and acupuncture and a master of several Eastern arts, he brings decades of study and experience to help people discover their own power to heal and uplift their lives.

His books help people to understand the “soul” and how to connect with their own soul power and the science of soul healing to align the relationship between the soul, heart, mind, and body. He explains the all-important Law of Shen Qi Jing (Information, Energy, and Matter), where shen (information) includes soul, heart, and mind; qi is energy; jing is matter. This law reveals that soul leads heart, heart leads mind, mind leads energy, and energy leads matter. Throughout his work, he shows people how to effectively transform their negative shen qi jing to positive shen qi jing to heal and transform their lives.

Some abbreviated titles of Master Sha’s books include Soul Mind Body Medicine, The Power of Soul, Soul Healing Miracles, Soul Communication, Soul Wisdom, Tao Song and Tao Dance, Soul over Matter, Tao I and Tao II, Greatest Love, Greatest Forgiveness, Tao Science, and Tao Calligraphy Healing Field. Through his books, ancient and new Tao wisdom is made accessible for modern times. The power of unconditional love, forgiveness, and other key virtues flow and are embraced as methods for healing and transformation. Ancient wisdom from traditional Chinese medicine such as Five Elements Theory is made easy and applicable through practical healing techniques. The transformative art of Tao Calligraphy and the wisdom of Tao Science and quantum physics empower people to heal and manifest their dreams.

Providing guidance for every aspect of life, whether from an earlier book or one of his most recent and comprehensive books, Tao Calligraphy Healing Field: An Information System with Six Sacred Tao Techniques to Empower You to Heal and Transform Your Life, Dr. and Master Sha provides the tools and the wisdom for living optimally and creating the purposeful and fulfilling life you imagine.

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Synopsis

This memoir was written to honor my youngest brother’s influence over my life, the good, the bad, and the ugly of living with a Down Syndrome sibling. It tells the story of the children in my family, despite our parents’ frailties, remaining committed to each other through life’s many changes and separations. Who I am today is directly related to the who I needed to become.

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Praise

“As the intertwined life stories of the author and her brother Bruce emerge, the story takes on a new tone. Bitterness and rancor are replaced with a gentle kind of mellowness and a roaring-fire-on-a-cold-winter-day kind of warmth. This is underscored when the author writes that her plans for Bruce were “to open and enrich his world.” In the end, however, she realizes how being with Bruce “accomplished so much more.” She realizes how this “sweet small man” and “Bruce’s” capacity to love and to “just go on because there was no other choice” profoundly influenced her life. And how Bruce opened and enriched her world.

Oh, and the title? You’ll have to read the book for yourself to figure that one out. Flavored with gentle humor and tongue-in-cheek wit, Listen to Me isn’t a long read. At about 30,000 words, you can finish it in an afternoon. But the reflections and insights will reverberate much longer.”- Kristine, Pages and Paws

“This book is a touching story about the unconditional love between an older sister and her brother, Bruce. The prose is uplifting and inspirational, without the traces of ableism that can be found in other such works. The overall message is a plea to see people for who they are, not their diagnosis and aims to increase disability awareness.”- Laura Quinn, Laura Quinn Writes

“This memoir is exactly what I needed. It made me laugh and cry and helped me appreciate the people in my life even more than I already did. Bruce’s love for his family, friends, and favorite rock ‘n’ roll idols lives on through this book. His larger-than-life personality left such an impression on me; I can honestly say that I feel like I know him without ever having met him. I think about him from time to time and his essence inspires hope in me, showing me how precious it is to have an innocent view of life at any age.

This book means so much to me. Lynne Podrat is a true artist with her words and the life she created around the people she loves. Her tenacity and devotion to her family—and herself—is unparalleled. She is a badass. If I could just accomplish half of what she has, I would be happy.”-Sandi, Proof Reader Sandi 

Guest Review from Gud Reader

Not so often do you get a memoir so immaculately written and touching on a sensitive issue like Down syndrome. Listen to me: how my down syndrome brother saved my life is just that book that fits this bill. The book revolves around two siblings Lynne and her brother Bruce who was born with Down syndrome. Just like the guardian angel she is, Lynne ensures that her baby brother is included in part of the family while also vowing to always protect him at all times.

Throughout the read, we get to know the powerful and persuasive character of Lynne and how her brother fuels her motivation to fight for the motivation of the family. Unlike the norm of sibling rivalry, these siblings learn to stick and look out for each other thus cementing some unwavering commitment to each other.

Lynne Podrat does a marvelous job of cramming the book with practical advice, resources, and also some indispensable information with some uplifting personal stories woven in. On her part, the author struck the right balance to entertain and also inform while keeping the reader engaged to learn more about how to enrich the lives of souls with Down Syndrome and also how they can reach their full potential. A story about braveness, finding your voice, and being encouraged to reach your best potential despite the hurdles. Really glad I read it!

Excerpt

Brucie’s Kids

Bruce’s involvement in Special Olympics and sports in general continued to dwindle while waiting for his final diagnosis of kidney disease. He lost his love of swimming and running. The energy needed for these sports was just not there. It was so sad as he had earned many a gold medal for running in Special Olympics. However, one sport he was willing to learn was soccer. Why? Randy played soccer and during Sunday visits to my home, along with my parents, everyone would attend Randy’s games.

I use the term learn loosely. Bruce’s education began with volleys back and forth in the street in front of our house. Randy would gently kick the ball to his uncle, who finally figured out he needed to kick the ball back, not pick it up and throw it. We would listen to their conversation from the driveway. “Okay, Uncle Bruce. I will kick the ball and you kick it back, like this. No, no. Don’t catch it. Just kick it back, like football.”

“Football?” Brucie would ask. “This is not a football,” Randy clarified. Even at a young age, Randy had great patience and respect for Bruce’s unique learning and physical capabilities, never getting frustrated with the repetition of instructions and coaxing his uncle who often did get frustrated. “Oh, come on,” Bruce would shake his head, his face crinkling up. “I can’t do this.” And he would walk away, Randy chasing him down to convince him back. The two had their own special bond. Though Bruce loved his nieces Arielle, Robyn, and Jerica, and his great-nieces, Randy’s daughters Maddie and Emily, his number one fan was Randy, whose comfort level with him was amazing. While growing up and now during Christmas visits back up north, watching them debate music, best artists, and Rock & Roll Hall of Fame nominees acknowledges that I did a good job making sure my brother would be remembered as an integral part of this family, stamped on their hearts forever.

We set up trash cans, bicycles, and our large planters as borders so the ball would stay in bounds during play, allowing the space to grow along with Bruce’s developing ability. Eventually, my father, Big Bruce, and I created a goal post so a “real” game could be played, with my father as permanent goalie and Big Bruce and me taking turns as rotating teammate or opposing goalie. My mother, cheerleader for both sides, received Brucie’s infamous dirty looks if she wasn’t cheering for his side. “Oh no, you cheat!” Brucie would stalk off our court shaking his head and hand once someone other than Randy or himself scored. He would allow us to cajole him back to the game as we laughed and ran after him. He enjoyed this game just as much as the soccer game. By the time Jerica joined her soccer team, Brucie was a pro, insisting either Randy or Jerica be on his team. When asked why he wanted the kids, we were told, “They know how to play.” If Big Bruce and I scored, Brucie would then insist on both so he could beat us, still claiming we cheated and loving us to cajole him back. We had a soccer ball, baseball, and football at the house in a bag with his name, hung next to Randy and then Jerica’s bags for whenever and whatever he wanted to play. Their sports becoming Bruce’s sports. His enjoyment of playing with “his kids,” as he liked to call them. Wonderful to watch.

My only regret was not being able to teach him how to ride a bike. He could never master the balance no matter how much we supported his weight or modeled what to do. We ended up finally donating the small girl’s twenty-inch bike with training wheels to Goodwill. Of course, in true Brucie fashion, once the small bike was gone, he decided he needed to learn how to ride Randy’s 24-inch bike. I am five-feet-two-inches tall and weighed, at that time, ninety-eight pounds. Brucie, four-foot-ten inches, weighed one hundred and twenty pounds. Guess who he wanted to hold him as he tried to get on the bike? The scene was as ridiculous as you can imagine. Nonetheless, I had the bike leaned against me, trying to get Bruce to stand on the curb and swing his leg over the bar. When you look up the word klutz, bear this picture in mind. By the third time of falling over with my brother on top of me, with the family laughing too hard to help, I gave up. We couldn’t get Bruce or David to peddle a tricycle when they were younger, let alone now, so I finally conceded defeat. Not an easy task for me.

Bruce playing Soccer with his kids

About the Author

Lynne Podrat graduated from the Pennsylvania State University and then spent fifteen years in the Fashion Industry as an Assistant Buyer and Department Manager with Bloomingdales Department Store before returning to school to receive her educational degrees from Arcadia University and Gynedd Mercy.

A retired educator and Administrator from the Philadelphia, Pennsylvania School District, she taught English, literature, composition, and history in elementary and secondary schools.

She has secretly been a writer and poet her whole life but has only recently chosen to share those talents with the world. Lynne now lives with her husband in Palm Beach Gardens, Florida, spending winters dragon boating where her heart races and summers hiking the Rockies in Vail, Colorado where her heart sings.

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Giveaway

This giveaway is for 3 print copies, one for each of 3 winners, and is open to the U.S. only.

This giveaway ends on April 15, 2022 midnight, pacific time.

Entries are accepted via Rafflecopter only.

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Synopsis

Mark never gave much thought to being adopted. He certainly never considered the possibility that the sixteen-year-old girl that had given birth to him might have gone on to marry his biological father and have three more children: Rachel, Benjamin, and Vincent. Full-blooded siblings that didn’t know his name, what he was like, or that he was struggling to start a family with his wife in Oregon. And none of them could have imagined how much their reunion would change each of their lives. Love & Genetics is the true story of a family discovering and rediscovering itself. It is a story of fear and love and an astonishing act that would salve old wounds and provide the foundation for a new family together.

Told from the unique perspectives of Mark and Rachel, this collaborative memoir explores family, adoption, surrogacy, and the search for one’s place in an increasingly disconnected world. It is intimate and engaging, humorous and poignant, and heartrendingly honest. Love & Genetics includes original correspondence and rarely-seen insights into the complex reunion of a biological mother and child, and a group of siblings who had no idea what they might find in each other. It’s a story of nature versus nurture and the challenges that surround both adoption and surrogacy. This story will resonate deeply with the many readers who have experienced adoption within their own families, those who have considered surrogacy or assisted reproduction, and with anyone who loves stories of real-life hope and heroism.

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Excerpt

Prologue (Mark)

This was not the first time I had been in the Calgary airport, but it was the first time in years and my first time as an International arrival. My flight from Portland, Oregon had only taken ninety minutes and hardly seemed worthy of the designation “International,” but the sign directing me to Customs and Immigration seemed stalwartly sure of it. My grey and tan North Face backpack was nearly empty. It had served me well since grad school and would continue to be my preferred carry on for many years to come, but with just my laptop inside, it felt too light for air travel and refused to ride as comfortably over my shoulder as it should have. I had a checked bag too, but that was largely empty also—just a change of clothes, some toiletries, and a good bottle of wine that I hoped to share. I wouldn’t be staying long, just the one night.

The morning plane touched down uneventfully and I was soon navigating the glass-walled maze of the international terminal. The myriad of signs and arrows were ostensibly guiding me toward customs, although the route clearly prioritized security over expediency. Fair enough. I readjusted my pack again, trying not to lose myself in thoughts of the day ahead. Through the glass I peered into the passing moments of other travelers— travelers already in Canada, travelers on the other side of the glass divide. I watched families trudge their way through the terminal with kids and bags straggling behind them. Lone adults passed time in a Tim Horton’s with a cup of coffee and a MacLean’s. Where were they headed on this Saturday morning? Where had they come from? Were they on time? Were they glad to be traveling? Were any of them worried about what they might find at their destination?

Airport customs was a small affair in Calgary; they must not get many international flights. There were only a half-dozen kiosks and only two of those were staffed by an agent that morning. But at 10:00 a.m. on a Saturday there was no need for any more. I paused at a high, narrow table near the back of the open room to scrounge through the second pocket of my backpack for a pen to fill out the blue and white customs form. Fortunately, I never cleaned my pack out completely, so there was always a pen, business card, or cough drop to be found in there when needed; I had, of course, double-checked for contraband before I left, knowing full well there wouldn’t be any, but it’s always worth being sure. My completed form in hand, I chose the kiosk on the left, the one with the woman agent and only one other traveler in line. After a rolling stop at the broad red line marked on the floor, I made my way to the side-counter of the kiosk, trying not to look nervous. It never helps to look nervous at a Customs and Immigration inspection. I reminded myself that I had nothing to hide here, I was not doing anything wrong. It was the rest of the day that I was nervous about.

The customs agent took my Canadian passport and opened it to the photo page. She looked me square in the eyes and then proceeded to size me up head-to-toe before returning her gaze to my hopefully anxiety-free face.

“Citizenship?” She began in a voice that was both friendly and tired, yet still held an undercurrent of authority.

“Canadian.”

I had just handed her my passport, of course I was Canadian. I suppose they have to ask, perhaps to get a potential perjury on record, or perhaps just to see who they can trick. But it did say clearly right there on the front cover: CANADA PASSPORT (and then again in French, of course, PASSPORTE). It even goes a step further on the first page, explicitly listing my citizenship as CANADIAN, in case the reader had somehow missed the lettering on the outside cover. I imagined that once in a blue moon someone answers the citizenship question “Italian” while holding a passport from Albania and that’s how they catch bad guys. The people who mess that one up must be extremely nervous-looking.

“Where do you live?” Her focus had now returned to her computer screen, which presumably listed all sorts of interesting details about my immigration credentials and prior travels.

“Portland, Oregon, in the States.” I had been living in the US for more than a decade and had had this same conversation many times while crossing back into Canada at various borders. I had learned from experience that it did not serve to rush to any explanations or caveats, just answer their questions directly and succinctly and they’ll get to the next part at their own pace.

“Why are you living in the USA?”

“I work for Intel Corporation there and live with my wife, who is American. I have a green card.” I had my proof of residency at the ready and it was halfway across the side-counter before she asked for it.

“What are you doing in Canada today?”

This was the question I had been bracing for. Except for Tina, my wife, I hadn’t told anyone why I was taking this trip: not my friends, not my job, not even my parents.

In that moment, my life as I knew it shrank from me and I felt utterly alone. But by law, here at the Immigration kiosk, I needed to be honest, and I had resolved to be plain about it. “I’m meeting my biological family,” I said.

The agent paused and turned to look back up at me, ignoring her screen for a moment.

“First time?” she asked with genuine interest. “Yes” was my spoken reply, although I was on the verge of tears and I’m sure that she could see that piece of my response as well.

“Well, you win the prize,” she said with a wry smile. She stamped my passport and slid my documents back to me across the counter. “Best story of the day. Go on.”

As I turned to head toward the baggage claim area, I heard her add “good luck.”

“Thanks,” I replied without turning back. I don’t know if she heard me. I meant it, but I was too busy holding on to my edges to care about properly completing the social nicety. It was strange, surviving that one moment of honesty and the agent showing herself to be an ally of my quest. It allowed me to breathe normally again and gave me a tiny flush of confidence. Within minutes the world was slowly sinking back into the normalcy of airport navigation and I found myself successfully continuing to put my feet in front of each other as I made my way through baggage claim and on toward the rental car pickup. Searching for the right numbered stall in the sparsely lit garage, I paused and felt the ground more solid beneath me than it had been in days. As I stood there, staring at the white Ford Focus in front of me, the customs agent’s prize comment ran through my mind again, and it made me wonder.

© Mark MacDonald & Rachel Elliott, 2021

About the Authors

Mark MacDonald lives in Beaverton, Oregon. He is an Adjunct Professor at Portland State University and a Principal Engineer at Intel Corporation and has authored more than forty scientific publications, for which he has received multiple awards, including the Martin Hirschorn Best Paper Prize from the International Acoustics Congress (2010).

Synopsis

Megan Jackson Hall has struggled with her mental health for decades. Faith, Romance, and Creations through Psychosis is her powerful memoir that delves into a range of personal topics, including the author’s continued distrust of her ex-husband and her belief in his connections to the mafia. It also explores her dream of a free worldwide online JK-doctorate institute, her ideas for revolutionizing the Catholic Church, and creating a healing ranch for people suffering from mental health issues.

Faith, Romance, and Creations through Psychosis delves into how the author learns about her past and the connections of her family to the mafia. She recounts recurring dreams of a romantic relationship with a man named Gary Barlow, whom she believes communicates with her through his songs. She provides comfort for Catholics who want a church to come home to, and a clarion call for all who believe in access for everyone to free education and an easier way to receive treatment for mental health. The innovations that swirl through her head offers the promise of a brighter, more efficient future.

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About the Author

Megan Jackson Hall is a retired Catholic School teacher. She has a master’s degree in curriculum and technology and has been part of the mental health system for twenty years, including three hospitalizations. She was first diagnosed as schizophrenic in 2005, but later had her diagnosis adjusted to schizoaffective disorder, which marries symptoms of a mood disorder with those of schizophrenia. She has been on a variety of medications, the escapades of which are recounted here.

This is her second book. The first was My Colour-Coded Life: Living with Schizoaffective Disorder. She lives alone in North Delta, British Columbia, Canada, and has two beautiful daughters.

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