At Close Range: A Memoir of Tragedy and Advocacy

By Leesa Ross

Publisher: Texas Tech University Press

Pages: 192

Pub Date: April 15, 2020

Categories: Nonfiction / Memoir / Personal Transformation / Advocacy

Leesa Ross did not expect to write a book. Neither did she expect the tragedy that her family endured, a horrific and sudden death that led her to write At Close Range. Her debut memoir is the story of what happened after her son Jon died in a freak gun accident at a party. Ross unsparingly shares the complexities of grief as it ripples through the generations of her family, then chronicles how the loss of Jon has sparked a new life for her as a prominent advocate for gun safety.  Before the accident, Ross never had a motivation to consider the role that guns played in her life. Now, she revisits ways in which guns became a part of everyday life for her three sons and their friends.

Ross’s attitude towards guns is thorny. She has collectors and hunters in her family. To balance her advocacy, she joined both Moms Demand Action and the NRA. Through At Close Range, the national conversation about gun control plays out in one family’s catalyzing moment and its aftermath. However, At Close Range ultimately shows one mother’s effort to create meaning from tragedy and find a universally reasonable position and focal point: gun safety and responsible ownership.

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The role of guns in our society receives mixed thoughts. There are those that think they should be banned and there are those that believe in the right to bear arms. This memoir shows that there can be a balance between the two and it comes down to understanding the power that a gun can hold and being smart and safe using guns.

“I just didn’t believe bad things would happen to people like us, people in the bubble. I didn’t believe Jon would ever be in a room with an unsecured gun and not enough gun safety to survive.”

Leesa dealt with a tragedy that no parent should have to endure, the loss of a child through a gun accident. While the truth about what actually happened that night is still unknown due to mixed stories, the end result is the same, a young man lost his life and that impacted his family and friends. From the book, it seems to have affected Leesa the most, and perhaps that is because these are her words and only impressions of what her husband and sons might be feeling after the accident. Reading her words, I could feel her sorrow as she progressed through the stages of grief. What impressed me is that she didn’t try and cover up her own faults and admits to being selfish and feels guilty.

“After something tragic overwhelms your life, it takes a while to determine your guilt. I always look for my guilt when anything goes wrong. Those early days were too soon for me though. I wanted a label for what I believe even while my pain was still fresh.”

“I can’t fully explain why our marriage survived. I think it was because while I am selfish, Randy isn’t.”

The majority of this book is about their life as a family, the moves they made from Texas to North Carolina, and the fallout from Jon’s death. Leesa didn’t agree with the suicide listing on the death certificate and fought to have it changed, to no success. There are some strong facts that would make me question the diagnosis but no one seemed to think her ideas had merit. Her struggle to accept this shines throughout the book. During her period of grief, she realized there was more that she wanted to do but wasn’t quite sure where to start. She joined several organizations that sought to educate people on gun safety and how to secure them properly. One of those programs is Be Smart and Leesa was a speaker for this organization. Like any advocacy group, there are those that have extreme views on guns. The following came from a review of their book, but Leesa said it predicted what she was about to experience in her own efforts.

What I came to see is that Moms Demand Action, the leadership group for Be Smart, is an organization where volunteers “are expected to conform to a set of rigid and condescending rules, not ask too many questions or provide constructive criticisms.”

It was during her educational discussions that she realized how she wanted to focus her energies, and that was on older children that were outside what Be Smart targeted. I like that her presentations were about safety and how to ensure that people did not have to go through the pain of losing someone to a gun accident. She created six pillars to educate on gun safety and even created a pledge for young people to sign. She made an impact on those she spoke to and made a difference in their lives by reframing how they think about guns and their safety. I appreciate that she is not trying to stop people from owning guns, just to be safe around them and how they are handled, and for opening the door for parents to have conversations about gun safety with their children.

This book can be a hard one for some to read, especially if they lost someone due to a gun accident, but I think that most will be able to relate to Leesa and what she endured and how she processed her grief. It sends a strong message and the story is not prettied up to make everyone feel good because this is not a feel good story. But it is a story with a message that any reader should be able to obtain after reading this book.

We give the book 4 paws up and will send readers down the path and look at their own lives and what are they doing to educate on gun safety.

Leesa Ross is a debut author who’s transformed a tragedy into a mission for safety. After losing a son to a shooting accident, she formed Lock Arms for Life, an educational organization teaching gun safety. A Texas mother of three, she leads Lock Arms, sits on the board of Texas Gun Sense, and belongs to the NRA.

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