A DELIGHTFUL LITTLE BOOK ON AGING
by
Stephanie Raffelock
Genre: Inspirational / Spiritual / Essays / Self-Help
Publisher: She Writes Press
Publication Date: April 28, 2020
Number of Pages: 119 pages
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All around us, older women flourish in industry, entertainment, and politics. Do they know something that we don’t, or are we all just trying to figure it out? For so many of us, our hearts and minds still feel that we are twenty-something young women who can take on the world. But in our bodies, the flexibility and strength that were once taken for granted are far from how we remember them. Every day we have to rise above the creaky joints and achy knees to earn the opportunity of moving through the world with a modicum of grace.
Yet we do rise, because it’s a privilege to grow old, and every single day is a gift. Peter Pan’s mantra was, “Never grow up”; our collective mantra should be, “Never stop growing.” This collection of user-friendly stories, essays, and philosophies invites readers to celebrate whatever age they are with a sense of joy and purpose and with a spirit of gratitude.
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Praise
“Where are the elders? The wise women, the crones, the guardians of truth here to gently, lovingly, and playfully guide us towards the fulfillment of our collective destiny? It turns out that they are right here, in our midst, and Stephanie Raffelock is showcasing the reclamation of aging as a moment of becoming, no longer a dreaded withering into insignificance. A Delightful Little Book on Aging lays down new and beautiful tracks for the journey into our richest, deepest, and wildest years.” – Kelly Brogan, MD, author of the New York Times bestseller A Mind of Your Own
“A helpful, uplifting work for readers handling the challenges of growing older.” – Kirkus Reviews
This is an introspective book about aging as a person, especially as a woman, and is a book meant to be savored and reflected upon. We all feel what the author has felt at one time or another whether we are over 60 or under 60. This is a crazy world and we have to learn how to adapt and cope so that we don’t make ourselves crazy in the process.
This book is divided into four sections that address different aspects of how to age gracefully. The sections are Grief, Reclamation, Vision, and Laughter. Grief is letting go of ideas of what it means to be young or what you believe youth means from the outside. Reclamation is reclaiming who you are and perhaps past hobbies or interests that might be a new outlet for you. Vision is becoming engaged in life and perhaps taking what you reclaimed and make it your own. And laughter really doesn’t need much explanation – it is celebrating life and not letting the little things bring you down.
There are many ideas that are repeated and to me, that means you need to take note of those things because they are important. Exercise is one of those that is repeated many times and I can understand that because if you stay active you are able to do more things that keep you young. I like how the author doesn’t say you need to be in a gym or lifting weights – just walk.
“None of us are in it alone. We are moving toward the sunset together, and on that horizon eternity lingers. May we all embrace living fully, with unabashed joy and appreciation for this path of transition.”
No matter your age, we all need to sit back and enjoy life and those that are in our life. You never know what tomorrow will bring and by enjoying the simple pleasures in life and those around us, we make our days more fruitful and blessed.
“You don’t need a PhD to see that the personas we craft for social media are all rainbows and unicorns. It’s as though the struggles of our lives are shameful and must be kept secret. We need places (probably not social media) to give air to what it means to be human. Too much energy convincing everyone of how positive you are while holding sorrow in abeyance can turn a person numb.”
“Social media is not reality. Be real. Be vulnerable. Be authentic, and be yourself…and don’t waste too much time on social media.”
These two passages resonated with me especially in the crazy times we live in today. Many times I don’t want to even log into Facebook, Twitter, or even read/watch the news because of the negativity and the hate that I see many show towards one another. It saddens my heart that many do not want to have civil conversations with someone they don’t agree with about the hot button topics. But if we communicate with each other on an equal playing field, we may discover some information we didn’t know before, and perhaps our viewpoint will change or we will have a better understanding of how others think.
“What we shed are the “things” that gather dust – the things that bind, the things that have become clutter. The new skin is made of of the intangible – purpose, meaning, connection, joy, and love.”
This statement is so true and relevant. We have become a world of consumers and these purchases bog us down. What is really important is the experiences and relationships we have with others. This is a good reminder for me to not worry about “things” and to enjoy life and the relationships with my friends and family.
“Taking full deep breaths slows everything down. I close my eyes and breathe deeply ten times. With each exhale I say to myself, “thank you.” And isn’t “thank you” a beautiful prayer to whisper throughout the day?”
I am a big believer in taking deep breaths to calms and center myself. I never thought about saying Thank You while doing this and it makes sense. We are thanking the universe for providing for us. I plan to do this next time I need some calming breaths.
There are so many parts of this book that I enjoyed, from her frank discussions about life to sharing stories that touch your heart. I especially enjoyed a story about six teenage young women that were at a pool helping a friend through a tough time. From the outside, you might think that they are shallow or vapid young women, but if you look past appearances and listen to conversations, you might find the truth is the complete opposite.
Here are some of my other favorite lines from the book:
“I worked with my hairstylist so I could stop dying my hair. Now it’s turning silver. I prefer the word “silver” over “gray” because silver sparkles, and I think that women our age sparkle.”
“Love, even the size of a parakeet’s heart, is eternal.”
“The conclusion was that we fear insignificance.”
“I have accepted that, in order to be successful, I need failure.”
“As the plane landed, all the babies stopped crying. Clearly the whole thing had been planned. They had probably met at the changing table in one of the airport restooms and plotted their little baby tyranny.”
Overall this was a delightful book and there are many nuggets of wisdom to take with you as you continue on through life. I think many could learn a little something from this book and I plan to share it with my girlfriends because I feel like they will learn something from this book.
We give this book 4 1/2 paws up and suggest picking up a copy for yourself and your friends.
Stephanie Raffelock is the author of A Delightful Little Book on Aging (She Writes Press, April 2020). A graduate of Naropa University’s program in Writing and Poetics, she has penned articles for numerous publications, including the Aspen Times, the Rogue Valley Messenger, Nexus Magazine, Omaha Lifestyles, Care2.com, and SixtyandMe.com. Stephanie is part of the positive-aging movement, which encourages viewing age as a beautiful and noble passage, the fruition of years that birth wisdom and deep gratitude for all of life. She’s a recent transplant to Austin, Texas, where she enjoys life with her husband, Dean, and their Labrador retriever, Jeter (yes, named after the great Yankee shortstop).
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| 7/9/20 | Notable Quotable | That’s What She’s Reading |
| 7/9/20 | Review | StoreyBook Reviews |
| 7/10/20 | Review | Carpe Diem Chronicles |
| 7/10/20 | BONUS Post | Hall Ways Blog |
| 7/11/20 | Author Video | All the Ups and Downs |
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| 7/13/20 | Author Interview | Texas Book Lover |
| 7/13/20 | Review | Forgotten Winds |
| 7/14/20 | Review | Momma on the Rocks |
| 7/15/20 | Podcast | The Clueless Gent |
| 7/15/20 | Review | Kelly Well Read |
| 7/16/20 | Review | It’s Not All Gravy |
| 7/17/20 | Guest Post | Missus Gonzo |
| 7/17/20 | Review | Sydney Young, Stories |
| 7/18/20 | Review | Books and Broomsticks |
| 7/18/20 | Review | Reading by Moonlight |
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I agree – lots of great nuggets of wisdom
I certainly don’t need this book. I already own two copies (and bought one for a friend). I keep one handy in my home office, and one by the bedside. It’s the kind of book that you can flip to any page and read what you need at that moment. My neck hurts from repeatedly nodding as I turn page after page knowing through her well-chosen words that Stephanie Raffelock gets me. She’s not just the real deal; she’s the wise deal. She writes, “Life has never been so full, and I don’t mean with busyness. I mean with intent. The intent of living and loving in great fullness. This is what wisdom is. This is what it means to get older.” Here’s a secret though. It may be a book on aging, but it contains wisdom that we could all benefit from.
awww, that is so touching you made me misty! For many years I had my two pups helping me read and review. They have both crossed the Rainbow Bridge but I believe they are here with me in spirit, much like Jeter is with you.
And . . . may I just say that I love the little paws on the book review? My sweet dog of 13 years died on June 1st. His name was Jeter (after the great Yankee shortstop) and he was always by my side. When I saw the paw prints on the review, I had this thought that it was Jeter letting me know that he was watching over me. A lovely experience on this day. Thank you.
I am very happy to have you here today Stephanie. The book offers some wonderful insights and things to think about whether you are 20 or 80 or anywhere in between.
So many nuggets to share!
So much goodness in the book!
Great review! This is about the most quote-a-licious review I’ve ever read, and it makes me even more ready to read the book (I just started it). Thanks for the post!
What a terrific review. I especially loved seeing the quotes from the book. There is so much there that is quotable. 🙂
Hi. I’m Stephanie Raffelock, the author of A Delightful Little Book on Aging. I wanted to check in and see what you were up to.
For the past four months I’ve been talking about what “strange” times these are. Who can get away from the “strange” topic of the day? A few days ago I stopped talking about these times in terms like strange and weird, and start talking about these times as being transformative. It’s as if we’re all being called to re-imagine and re-invent ourselves and our world.
There’s a call to do inner work so that we’re more in touch with our forgiving selves, our grateful selves and our caring about others selves. It’s what I like to think of as soul work. Transformative work.
My greatest hope is in the people around me — family, neighbors, friends. Even though I don’t get to see much them except on Zoom, those folks remind me that at heart, we are basically good. And I think that’s what’s going to pull us through. And I’m going to start calling these days the transformative days.
What’s one good thing that’s happening in your life because of these times? My good thing is this book blog tour — a virtual experience of connecting with people in the spirit of goodwill.
I hope you’ll pick up a copy of my book and let it inspire you to age with grace and with gratitude. At the end of the day, it’s all about the gratitude, isn’t it? Be well and big hugs.